Smittyisms

WE MOVED

2011-10-09T23:54:00.001-06:00

We decided to consolidate our family's blog at http://romneysonbainbridge.blogspot.com/

Smith is 7!

2010-09-26T22:25:00.004-06:00

Smith turned 7!

We fulfilled his birthday wish by heading down to Legoland.

Per Smith's request: white cake, with strawberry mouse and
chocolate frosting in between with vanilla frosting.

We stayed in Del Mar and spent the next day at a Dog Surf-a-thon.

The kids loved it, we loved Del Mar, and Smith LOVED his birthday.

First Grade

2010-08-26T21:51:00.005-06:00

All ready for First Grade.

Smith, Aiden, Maggie, Mia and Chloe.

His teacher is Ms. Voltaggio -or Ms. V. She told the kids to pick the desk they wanted and Smith picked the very front.

Day One was a success! It was 110 degrees out and the kids were melting, but he had a great day!

So literal

2010-05-11T10:52:00.003-06:00

Adam and the kids made a huge fort in the family room over the weekend.

Dad: "Who wants to be the president?"

Laine and Smith: "I DO! I DO! I DO!"

Dad: "Well, maybe we should have a meeting to decide."

Laine, with squeals of delight: "Oh!! I want to be the meeting!"

Smith, with disgust: "You can't be the meeting, Laine. It's a group of people!"

To Dad:

2010-04-29T20:08:00.002-06:00

"Utes won that was fun. BYU lost because they" the back continues: "were too slow."

Thought this great drawing and poem from Smith's homework might make your long day at work a little better.

Easter Best

2010-04-19T11:06:00.001-06:00

Smitty

2010-04-01T17:24:00.002-06:00

Still obsessed with Star Wars Legos,

plays with his sisters,

loves Rosey, and now the Dodgers,

and loves to read! What could be better?

Happy Birthday Poppie!

2010-01-27T15:37:00.002-07:00

Toofless

2010-01-16T11:31:00.002-07:00

This is one brave kid! Not a whimper and he even passed up ice cream to go back to school (still bloody) to show off his new grin. "I'll get used to it eventually Mom."

Gender Stereotyping

2009-12-07T15:55:00.004-07:00

Smith: (Singing) "Let Earth receive her King. Let earth receive her King."
"Wait. Does it say her? Is earth a girl? "

Mom: Well, yeah. Have you ever heard of 'Mother Earth?'

Smith: "Oh. I guess that's why there are trees. You know and hair on the earth."

New Smitty Pics

2009-11-20T00:05:00.005-07:00

Making Cookies

2009-10-29T23:23:00.004-06:00

Boo season is here, so we've been making lots of cookies.
The kids have loved it and we still love to end the night with
hot cocoa even when it's 90 degrees.

First Day of Kindergarten

2009-10-20T22:28:00.003-06:00

Walking to school.

Smith's buddy Ryan,

Outside classrooms.

Lainey was just as excited as Smitty.

And, luckily they have Legos there too!
He LOVED his first day.

Smith is 6!

2009-10-20T21:57:00.003-06:00

Here are some of the highlights (besides legos):
Birthday Boy

Tie-fighter cakes and movie food,

a backyard movie,

and some good buddies.

We Are The World....

2009-10-14T17:56:00.003-06:00

Smith had a long day of playing with his buddy today. In the car from the friend's house to ours, they were talking about how cool it was that they could play for so long.
Friend: "It's like we're having two play-dates. One was at my house and now the second at yours!"

Smith: "It would be really cooler if we could invite all our friends in the whole wide world....like even the Chinese!"

Church Thoughts-by Smith Romney

2009-10-11T21:51:00.002-06:00

"Jesus came back alive and then we went back to school."

"The temple is a house of love because Jesus lives there."

Like Geeps, Like Grandson?

2009-09-16T22:16:00.003-06:00

I finally got Smith to open up a little about school today as I drove him to soccer practice. He was gabbing away with his friend, and quite at his leisure, so I figured it was a good time to drill the two boys about their new school. I asked Dillon what his favorite part about school was and he gave the obvious reply, "recess." To Smith, I offered up the same question, expecting to get the same answer.

"Well. I like learning the best."

Shocked, I asked what he liked to learn the best.

"Numbers. I like to learn all about numbers."

Not sure I'm related to this kid since I personally liked recess the best. However, as a new Kindergartener Mom, I couldn't be more proud or excited.

I'm Better, You're Better, I'm Best

2009-09-16T21:20:00.003-06:00

Smith: "Rosey is the cutest baby at our house. Laine is the silliest. I am the smartest. Dad is the muscley-est. And Mom. You're the....you're the cookiest."

Thank you Smith. For me, that's the ultimate.

Hill of Funness (& the Tar Pits)

2009-09-08T16:39:00.006-06:00

Tar pits were great, but so was the hill!

She's Here!

2009-09-06T10:26:00.003-06:00

Rosey Romney
August 3, 2009

Graydon and Jenni came down and stayed to play with the kids and meet the babe. Thanks guys!

(And this time, he did not seem to care that she was a girl and not Flash!)

July

2009-09-06T10:05:00.004-06:00

While we waited for the baby to come....

Smith learned to swim, played with friends,

went to the car show at Lacy Park,

beached it up,

and we were tuckered out at the end of each day!

National Geographic

2009-08-19T21:39:00.004-06:00

A few weeks ago, Smith got a new toy bow and arrow. For the next few days, he became an Indian. He did not wear a shirt, carried the bow everywhere, wore the quiver over his shoulder, and attached a sheath to his belt with a toy hunting knife. That week, we went to the library and found a few kids books about Indians. When I came home and thumbed through one of them, I saw some depictions of early Native American women that were a bit too realistic for a five-year-old. I showed Whitley the picture and said, "This book might have to go back. It's a bit too National Geographic for Smith."

Flash forward a few weeks later, when Poppie and Geeps were in town and Poppie was helping Smith get ready for bed. She picked up one of his new library Native American books to read to him. When she showed him which book it was, Smith asked, "Poppie, we can't read that book. It's, um....what's another word for naked?" Poppie, a little confused, began to come up with any synonym she could for the word naked: nude, bare, no clothes, nudies-tudies, scantily clad, etc., when Smith yelled, "Oh yeah! Geographic! We can't read that book it is just too geographic!"

Everything but Pie

2009-07-25T09:30:00.003-06:00

Smith: "Hey Mom. We get to have lunch at Knotts Berry today."

Mom: "Yep. And you'll get to eat their biscuits with yummy jam and maybe some Boysenberry Cobbler for dessert."

Smith: "What? I don't want to eat Poison-berry anything! Maybe I should eat at home."

Summer at the Cabin

2009-07-07T22:20:00.003-06:00

There's always fun to be had at the cabin. Smith braved the hill on his dirt bike,

rode horses,

was nice to his sister,

still might have a little crush on Aunt Jenni,

ate tons of S'mores (and C'ello's),

had his cousin Chase up for a sleepover and lots of exploring,

hiked with Geeps,

and his way prego Mom.
(Also played lots of Wii with Aunt Merrill and Uncle DUG).
Hopefully we'll get to go back soon!

Is That All?

2009-06-23T20:03:00.003-06:00

While eating dinner at the cabin tonight:

Smith: "Mom. How come Dad decided to marry you?"

Mom: "Cause I'm the coolest?"

Smith: "No. It's because you like the color green."

Mom: (Speechless)

Smith: "And you married Dad because he likes red."

Of Course You Do

2009-06-17T21:31:00.004-06:00

Smith: "Hey Mom. Could you play Indy on the Wii with me?"

Mom: "Uh, No. I don't know how."

Smith: "Yes you do. You said you played when you were little."

Mom: "Smith that was Mario Bros. Wii was not around when I was little."

Later on....

Mom: "Okay, time to say prayers."

Smith: "Mom. Were prayers invented when you were little?"

Mom: "Yeah."

Smith: "Oh. Stink. I wish they were invented after I was little."

Diarrhea of the Mouth?

2009-06-02T19:22:00.005-06:00

It has been a long day of Smith. I LOVE the kid, but he literally has not stopped talking since he came home from school at noon. He has loads of ideas running through that little head of his and has let me know every single one. He talks while eating; going to the bathroom; playing with toys; playing a computer game; slipping down the slip and slide; sitting in time-out; riding his bike; looking at books, etc., etc., etc. He can say a prayer and hold a separate conversation ALL AT THE SAME TIME! As I'm trying to write this post he asks me, in one breath:

"Mom. Hey Mom! What speaks louder than actions? Do you know? Well, I do. Fire engines. Really loud ones. You could hear them all the way to Belgium. Hey, then Oma and Apa could hear them too! See, louder than actions. Mom. My eyes don't hurt anymore. I'm almost done with my chicken. . . ."

Sometimes this quality is quite endearing and can fill a dull day with a million fun things to do and talk about and imagine. For some reason, today is not one of those, but we'll keep our fingers crossed for tomorrow.

Juice anyone?

2009-05-11T09:46:00.003-06:00

Smith: Hey Dad, can I have a drink of juice out of the cup that has that white thingy in it?

Me: What white thingy?

Smith: The white thing that stops you from drinking those things that look like nose hairs?

Me: What???

Smith: You know, when you drink orange juice, there are all those nose hairs in it? This cup stops you from drinking the nose hair things.

Me: Are you talking about pulp?

Smith: Yeah, I don't like the pulp, so I like to use the cup that blocks the pulp.

No wonder he doesn't like pulp. . . .

Say What?

2009-04-24T13:51:00.005-06:00

(Smith and Mitchell)

Yesterday-

Smith: "Mom. My friend John is half Korean, right?"

Mom: "Yep."

Smith: "Well, I'm Spanish."

Mom: "Since when? I thought you were Caucasian....like, white?"

Smith: "Nope. I am not white. I am so Spanish."

Then today,

Smith: "Hey John. Are you Korean?"

John: "Yeah. It's the best. When food drops on the floor I can blow on it and eat it."

Smith: "Huh? Hey Mitchell, you're Spanish right?"

John: "No he's not! He's white! Duh!"

Smith: "Whatever. We're both Spanish."

Celebrity Look-alike?

2009-04-24T09:14:00.004-06:00

Smith: "Hey Mom, when my friends come over tomorrow, we're going to play Kung Fu Panda. I'm going to be the Master (surprise, surprise), John can be Monkey, Mitchell can be the mean Tiger, and Dillon can be Crane. Oh yeah and Lainey can be Tigress. Who do you want to be?"

Mom: "I want to be the Old Turtle guy that knows everything."

Smith: "Um, Mom. How 'bout you can be Po. 'Cause he has a really big belly. Hey can you
bounce stuff off your belly too?"

Pink is for Boys Too, Right?

2009-04-17T20:52:00.002-06:00

This shirt was Smith's pick this year, but he made sure to tell his Dad that it is okay for boys to wear pink too.

Easter Egg Hunt

2009-04-17T18:15:00.004-06:00

Making bunny Easter bags

Smith and John

Tyler, Smith, Laine and Dillon

Since we had no idea where to go for an Easter egg hunt in our new area, Smith, our resident party animal, decided we should host one of our own. Now, we may end up doing one every year as long as I promise the Easter bunny will hide more eggs. (Noted....thank you Smith.)

What will we do without Johnnie?

2009-03-30T13:34:00.002-06:00

"Mom! It is Summer!"

2009-03-30T13:21:00.005-06:00

Every morning since we moved to California, Smith has asked "Is is summer yet?" We told Smith that his buddy Dane from Colorado was coming to visit California in the summertime, and as Smith never forgets ANYTHING, he has asked me on a daily basis if it is summertime yet. It was easy to forestall his excitement when the weather was cooler, but once it started to get warm, and it started to feel like it should be summer, Smith got antsy.

So, when Dane appeared on our doorstep last week, he turned to me with a puckish look and said, "Mom! It is Summer!"

Smith had a blast with Dane (and Dalton) while he was here. They played and had a sleepover and now we miss them all over again.

O'Doyle Rules!

2009-03-30T12:16:00.008-06:00

Many of you can attest to Smith's competitiveness . . . no one is immune to Smith's ability to one-up you (child and adult alike). Smith's buddy Dillon was an easy target early this morning on the way to a birthday party. The two boys sat in the back of the car deep in conversation about important issues like birthday presents and Star Wars figures when I heard Dillon say something about the time his Mom and Dad met. I perked up my supersonic listening ears only to hear Smith's reply,

"Well, when MY Dad met MY Mom, my Dad had a lot of hair. Yeah. He had sooo much of it."

Baby Flash at Last?

2009-03-17T10:44:00.004-06:00

Smith: "Ummm. Doctor? How do you know if it's a girl for sure?"

Doctor: "Well, I'll show you."

The doctor found the correct position on the ultra-sound again and showed Smith what was 'missing' on the baby. Proof or not, Smith was still unconvinced. On the drive home, he kept trying to come up with meanings as to why the doctor's diagnosis was way wrong. Poor guy. His dreams of having 'Flash' as a little brother have been shattered once again.

He's Hooked

2009-03-13T21:02:00.003-06:00

Since we've been home, Smith has not stopped singing the songs from Hook; -"I'll never grow up, never grow up...." have been sung over and over and over again. He loved seeing 'little' Adam in his play, and I was so proud of Adam. You did such a great job!

And, unlike his sister Laine, he LOVED the snowmobile and sledding behind it. Unfortunately, by the time I got Lainey out there, he was frozen and ready to head in to warm up by the fire.

All I need to know I learned in Primary?

2009-03-02T18:26:00.004-07:00

"Dad. Thank you for working so Mom can buy my Star Wars figures."

signed, Smitho

(Adam found this wonderful thank-you note from Smith stuffed inside his shoe.)

Chase came! Chase came!

2009-02-18T13:40:00.003-07:00

Smith finally got his wish of having Chase at our house and at Disneyland. It was a great week, and we're ready for a repeat anytime!

Buds.

2009-02-18T13:01:00.006-07:00

80 is nice, but....

2009-02-07T17:16:00.005-07:00

Smith is missing the snow. The sledding hill especially. He went so fast down the hill that I don't have any pics of it. He loved it. Now if we can just get him to ski....

Smith is missing the snow. Thanks for all the rides up the hill, Geeps.

"You don't mess with animal. He eats glass man."

2009-02-07T17:03:00.005-07:00

No glass for this animal. But, like the crazed drummer, Smith too only has three styles of music- loud, louder and deafening. Dad is so proud. Thank you Santa.

Whitley's Christmas Sing-along

2008-12-04T20:57:00.006-07:00

We finally found the Christmas music channel in the car today. As soon as it came on, I started to sing along, loudly, in an attempt to cheer up the kids happy after a trip to the store.

Smith: "Mom. I just want to sit here and listen to the music in peace."

I keep singing.

Smith: "Um. That means I really don't want you to sing."

Okay. Point taken.

Progress

2008-12-03T11:13:00.002-07:00

Smith: "Heavenly Father, please bless the nesportan (neosporin) that Mom put on my knee to get all the dirt and germs out quickly because it still really stings. Amen."

Go UTES!

2008-11-18T22:21:00.002-07:00

Finally, we get to see the Utes! Smith was stoked, mostly to see Swoop, and Lainey literally screamed "Go Utes!" and danced all night long.

Halloween 08

2008-11-18T21:47:00.003-07:00

"Mom....how come the pumpkin patch is in a parking lot?"
The Pasadena pumpkin patch was not really what we'd envisioned.

Smith had this costume idea in his head for a long time. I of course, did not get it 'right', but he managed to put it on eventually. He had wanted to grow his hair out so that he had a tail like Anakin and then dye his hair. What the? He also had the wrong color of light saber. He is still not over that one.

New buddies....who luckily like Indiana Jones.

Fall in California

2008-11-18T21:35:00.002-07:00

Seal Beach

Who knew we'd have to rake leaves in California?
We just do it in shorts and 90 degree weather.

I wanna be, I wanna be like....

2008-11-14T00:16:00.004-07:00

Seriously, I think all of Smith's dreams have really come true.

California or Bust

2008-11-12T16:37:00.003-07:00

After a few heart-wrenching good-byes, and a few weeks of homelessness, we made it to California. Thank you to Grandma Poppie and Aunt Shanon for housing us while we waited forever for our truck to get here. Smith is just now realizing how far away from Colorado we are and that his buddies can't just walk on over after school. Luckily, days at Disneyland, the beach and nice warm weather are helping out a lot with his, and our, homesickness.

Twitterpated

2008-09-22T13:18:00.004-06:00

My little brother Graydon just got engaged last night. Over the summer, we got to spend some time with him and Jenni and we think Smith has a accrued a slight or rather ginormous crush on Jenni. At first he pretended that he couldn't remember her name. Fifty times a day he would ask me, "Mom, what is her name again?" Then he just couldn't stop saying her name. So fifty times a day he would sing, scream, and whisper, "Jenni." While Gray and Jenni were 'watching' a movie one night, Smith went over and snuggled in next to her. Soon, Smith had shimmied his hand into hers and sat holding hands with Gray's Jenni. The following Sunday at church, Smith of course had to sit next to Jenni. I leaned over to see how he was doing and found him sitting, hand in hers, with an enormous grin on his face. Smooth move buddy! Smith is ecstatic about the wedding news since that means Jenni will be around for a long time and I am afraid to say that this means that Merrill may be close to losing out on the favorite aunt status. So sorry Merrill. And Jenni, congratulations and thanks for humoring our Smith.

Star Wars Birthday

2008-09-22T13:00:00.003-06:00

Smith had a fun impromptu birthday party with his buddies. We went (finally) to his favorite place, Chuck-E-Cheese, and then back to our house for cake and presents. He/We have been so lucky to have such great friends in Colorado!

Socially Unacceptable, but FINALLY 5!

2008-09-12T13:53:00.005-06:00

Smith turned the big "5" yesterday and so far he has loved every minute of it. He came running in to my room in the morning gave me a huge hug and then stood back, grinning from ear to ear, standing really tall so that I could examine him and see that he had indeed grown since he had just turned 5. He had a fun day and had a lot of birthday calls from friends and family. His Uncle Graydon called last night too, and apparently, Smith was thrilled....

Smith: "Gray, when are we going to be done talking."
Gray: "Well, it's your birthday, so anytime you want."
Smith: "I want to be done right now."
Gray: Uncontrollable laughing.
Smith: Hangs up.

Hope he's not too old to learn some manners, sheesh.

First day of Pre-school

2008-09-08T16:37:00.002-06:00

Smith's other half, Dane

Me Too!

2008-08-26T13:29:00.004-06:00

Smith: "Mom. Did you know I have a spinning wheel in my head?"
Mom: "Really? What does it do?"
Smith: "It spins around and tells me what kind of dessert to have."

Smith's Buddies

2008-08-25T15:38:00.005-06:00

(Dalton, Dane, Mason and Smitty)

Our cul-de-sac is bustling with boys and Smith is loving every minute of it. After nights of begging to have a movie night with his buddies, we gave in. As you can imagine, it was crazy, and they had a blast.

Smith learns a fact of life

2008-08-16T15:23:00.003-06:00

Today we were doing errands and Whitley really needed to go. She had her legs crossed and was bouncing up and down in the front seat of the car. Smith told her, "Mom, just go! You can just go outside!" Whitley explained with urgency, "Smith, I can't go outside, I'm a girl." Then Smith said to no one in particular, "That must be a wiener thing."

Efficient Invocation

2008-08-15T22:47:00.004-06:00

Smith usually says the prayer before our meals. This repetition has allowed Smith to develop a standard prayer. This standard prayer always--and sometimes only--contains the following phrases: thank you for this day; thank you for my family; thank you for the food; bless it to make us healthy and strong. A couple of nights ago, maybe we were having one of his favorite meals for dinner, because he streamlined his standard prayer to the following: "Father heaven! Thank you! . . . Day! . . . Family! . . . Food! . . . Health and strong! . . . Amen!"

Here's to a Long Year

2008-08-13T15:56:00.005-06:00

Smith: "Hey Mom. Are we going to walk down to the school to meet my teacher today too?"

Mom: "No. You aren't going to that school yet, remember?"

Smith: "But, I get to go to kindergarten when I'm five, right?"

Mom: "Well, you get to go when you're six."

Smith: "That stinks! That really stinks!"

Smith just realized that he will not be going to kindergarten this year because he has a September birthday. He's bummed. Poor kid.

You're Not Spidey....

2008-07-16T11:40:00.006-06:00

Smith: "But Mom, I was being careful!"

Words Smith uttered as I entered his room to find the windows and screens open in the upstairs bedrooms. He had been out climbing on the roof of the three story cabin instead of staying in his room for his time-out. After exploring an even higher pitch of the roof, Smith got a nice scolding from his Mom and Geeps. And thanks to Geeps, I don't think he'll try that one again.

Smith's Recall

2008-07-16T11:10:00.003-06:00

In Woodland, there is a canal that comes off of the Provo River with a pretty calm current and is much deeper than the river. Graydon, Jenni ,Smith and I went to float it last Saturday. We found a great little life jacket for Smith, some tubes and we were off. The water was FREEZING! We're right in the Uintahs, so it is just ice cold water. As soon as Smitty felt the water he was immediately apprehensive and well, terrified to go down. We got him on my lap, waved to Lainey and my parents and headed down the canal.

We didn't get very far before we had to bail, get out and walk around a low bridge. Getting back in the water proved to more difficult than our first attempt. The water here was much more swift and a few yards down, there was a rather large tree branch sticking half way out of the water. Gray lost his tube, and since he was helping me with Smith, Jenni floated down to catch the tube. She hit the branch, and continued on. So, Smitty and I got on, and hit the same branch. We weren't so lucky. We flipped over backwards which sent Smith head first into the chilly water. The problem was that I was on top of him with the tube on top of me, and because of the current, I was stuck and couldn't get him out of the water. Graydon was only a few yards away, and saw our plight, and came to the rescue. Safely in Gray's arms and dripping wet, Smith choked out, "This stinky life vest didn't even work!"

That was it for Smith. We took him down a little farther to meet my parents and he high-tailed it out of there. Jenni, Gray and I had a great time floating and shivering the rest of the way, but because of a few more trouble spots, and another tip over (Jenni), I was glad Smith had headed for dryer, warmer ground.

Giddy-up!

2008-07-14T21:42:00.004-06:00

Smith had a horse lesson today. During his lessons, he rides around an arena and learns to balance, do simple commands, and to get his horse, Peppy, to obey go and stop-"WHOA PEPPY!" Sue kept telling Smith to kick with his boots and "click" to get Peppy to go. Poppie and I were standing on the fence watching and saw Smith riding along on Peppy snapping his fingers like he was keeping a beat to some rhythm only known to Smith.

Sue yelled out to Smith, "Okay, Smith, kick and click." Smith gave Peppy a solid kick with his right boot and kept snapping his fingers to the mystery beat. Sue said, "Smith, I can't hear your clicks." She then realized that he was clicking with his fingers not his tongue. No wonder Peppy didn't Giddy-up at his command. Snap to it Peppy!

Protector of the Innocent

2008-07-14T21:28:00.004-06:00

Even when we're out-of-town, in a totally different ward, Smith still does something to shock/amuse/baffle those who teach him. This story comes from our friend Sue who is the Primary president in my parents ward. She is also Smith's horse riding teacher and one of his favorite people. He absolutely loves coming to primary when she is there because she really gives him special attention (which he just eats up). Anyway, according to Sue, she was up at the front doing the sharing time activity and observed the kids making fun of one of the little Sunbeam kids. They were calling him names and telling him he had a purple face or red face. She even said one of the kids that never talks turned and told this kid that he had a black face. At this, Smith turned around from the front row to all the older kids and said, "You guys stop being mean to that kid!"

Then Smith turned to the kid sitting next to him and whispered, "But he really has a yellow face."

Are you Smith's Dad?

2008-07-11T14:25:00.004-06:00

Sometimes, its best to answer no to this question. The last two Sundays, Smith's primary teachers have tracked us down to tell us of "Smittyisms" that occurred in church that day.

1. Two weeks ago, the kids played charades during Sharing Time. Each kid acted out something they could do to help their mom and dad. I'm sure you can imagine: one kid pretended to vacuum the floor; one kid cooked pancakes; another kid pretended to change a diaper. When it was Smith's turn, he walked up on stage, and stood completely still. He then hurried and hid behind the lectern. Then, he got on his belly and army crawled. Apparently this went on for five minutes. No one could guess what he could be doing that was supposed to be helpful to his parents. Finally, one kid yelled out, "You're a spy!" That was it. I may still have him fooled.

2. Last Sunday, a new ward member tapped my should and asked if I was Smith's dad. She told me that during class that day, she asked each kid to thank Heavenly Father for something for which they are thankful. Smith said, "Heavenly Father, I'm really thankful for the Ninja Turtle dream you gave me last night. Can I have more of those?"

Since She Runs Like Flash

2008-06-29T23:07:00.004-06:00

Slept in the Tent

2008-06-29T22:20:00.007-06:00

We went on a camp out near our home in Superior to Marshall Lake with some friends over the weekend. The kids had a blast and Smith's all ready for next year, promising that then he'll be five and will be brave enough to sleep with Abe and Ethan in their own tent. Sure, buddy.

Hamburger Mouth

2008-06-25T13:42:00.003-06:00

Smitty had a little accident as we were walking through the locker rooms to leave the pool yesterday. He really smacked himself hard! Poor guy slipped and landed face first onto the tile. Luckily, he is much better today. The picture just does not do it justice. His gums are so black and blue and he has puncture marks in his lower lip from his upper teeth and a bump in the middle of his forehead.

Nobody's Perfect (according to Smith), Part Deux

2008-06-16T09:56:00.006-06:00

This post does not signify a return to Smith's anti-Jesus phase. He just strongly correlates Jesus-the creator-with everything and anything that has been created on earth. For example, we were walking to the Boulder Farmer's Market the other day, and Smith saw a brick in the sidewalk that had eight round nubs on top. He stepped on it and said, "Look, it looks like there is a Lego in the sidewalk. Ha! Jesus must have been playing a joke."

Cool Dude?

2008-06-15T22:59:00.002-06:00

Smith and his Dad on their way to see Kung Fu Panda.
With his hat on backwards, he boldly exclaimed, "I'm so cool, huh. I saw this really cool kid today who had his hat on backwards; it was a Sponge Bob hat. He was so cool."

Nobody's perfect (according to Smith)

2008-06-14T22:26:00.003-06:00

Smitty and I went to see King Fu Panda last night. As we walked from the car to the theater, Smith hopped and tiptoed over the cracks in the pavement. He stopped when he saw one especially big crack, turned to me and said, "Woah, Dad, look at that humongo crack! I guess Jesus messed up making this street."

Busted

2008-06-10T16:53:00.004-06:00

Smith called me at work today and asked what I was doing. "I'm just typing something boring," I replied. Silence filled the phone line. I wondered if Smith had hung up, since silence and Smith usually don't mesh. He spouted out, "You mean you are not going around spying on stuff?" An equally long pause ensued. I just then remembered that when he told me to quit my job and have mom make the money by going to meetings, I told him that I didn't actually go to meetings; I was a secret spy. I then swore him to secrecy, and he allowed me to continue going to work in the mornings. I tried to recover, "No, Smith, I'm really spying on stuff. I forgot you knew my secret." "Dad, I can hear you typing. You're not a spy. Bye." *Click*

The Truth Comes Out

2008-06-08T22:12:00.004-06:00

After church today, Smith came to me, begging and pleading for some computer game time. I had taken this away from him earlier when he threw the first tantrum in the church parking lot as we were trying to rush inside to get there in time for the sacrament. And, the second tantrum began when we were finally seated, about who knows what. So, when he came to me asking for a game, I reminded him of the earlier incidents.

"But Mom. Those were fake tears."

Not so Sentimental?

2008-06-08T21:37:00.007-06:00

Smitty had his last day of school last week. I asked him if he was sad to be leaving Peter Pan Preschool. He quickly responded with a huge "No." When asked why not? He said, "Well, Mom, next day I can visit Sue or whenever I want and Pat said she is going to come live at my house."
Oh, really?

We really will miss Peter Pan.

Nothing But Net

2008-05-21T22:37:00.005-06:00

I found Smith on the toilet this afternoon.

"Mom. I pooped. But it didn't touch my underwear or my shorts. It just went straight through to the floor and look...(pointing right to where my barefoot stood on the bathroom floor) No marks on the floor either. Sweet. Huh."

Smithen Hawking

2008-05-18T21:57:00.004-06:00

Last night, Smith came with me to pick up Megan the babysitter. I asked Megan what she had done that day, and she said that she went on a bike ride through the golf course. Smith piped up from the back seat, "My dad was at the golf course today." I had indeed been to the golf course on a run, but hadn't told Smith. I turned around and asked Smith, "How did you know that?" Smith replied, "My brain told me dad. I have a really big brain." Megan and I exchanged glances. The following exchange ensued:

Me: "Really? How big is your brain?"
Smith: "My brain is as big as space."
Me: "Wow. That's pretty big. But I think my brain is bigger."
Smith: "How big?"
Me: "My brain is as big as infinity."
Smith: "Dad, space and infinity are the same."

Touché.

Summer Fun

2008-05-15T13:05:00.011-06:00

After a really nice and unexpected phone call, I began reminiscing about my summers in Salt Lake with the Williams boys. We always had fun summers together, chuck full of adventures. I started to tell Smith about all the things that we did. This got him equally excited about summer and the fun that it entails. So as he was dreaming of summer on this cold and rainy day, Smith came up with a list of things that he wants to do "next" summer (he informed me that it can't be this summer because right now "this" is spring). Careful, because whether you like it or not, some of you readers may be included in his list.

1. Go to the cabin
2. Demolition Dirty (Derby)-to see the cars crash and sometimes spray dirt
3. Play at Oma's house
4. Play at Chase's house
5. Go to the Denver Zoo-specifically to go on the merry-go-round (Oma and Rachel will remember the meltdown over the merry-go-round at our last zoo visit)
6. Camping if it's not too scary
7. Play all day with Little Adam and his really tall brother (Andrew)

8. Hikes if we can have a picnic
9. Swimming, lots of swimming
10. Dino museum with Chase and Oma
11. Visit the Anderson farm
12. Camp-out in the backyard
13. Ride Peppy and Capt'n Jack at Sue the horse teacher's house
14. I even want to go to Hawaii
15. Swim with Dad and Graydon at the place with the big slide by Poppie's house cause then I can go to the cool movie theater by the ice cream shop
16. Sleepover with Chase
17. Sleepover with Uncle Graydon
18. Throw rocks in the Boulder creek
He then asked what I wanted to do this summer and answered it for me...
"Mom, you want to buy stuff."

And according to Smith, I will be paying for all of our adventures this summer with all of my money. He said I make a lot of money at all of my meetings. (What?)

The never-ending pukes

2008-05-12T13:05:00.006-06:00

Smith and Lainey have been really sick this past week. I keep thinking they're getting better, especially when Smith asked for chocolate chip pancakes, French toast, and a hard boiled egg for breakfast this morning, but then he eats and he's sick all over again or falls asleep naked in his towel after taking a bath. Smith has a good friend who lives next door and they play nearly every day. Since Smith has been sick, I've been trying to keep Smith in and away from his buddy so that he doesn't catch it. Smitty does not understand this and begs and pleads all day long to go out and play, giving me thumbs up sign, meaning that his stomach has stopped churning. I tried to explain that if he gets his friend sick, then his friend won't be able to play either. And to that, Smith had this to say:

"Well, Mom, if I'm puking and Mason is puking, then we'll both be puking and we can both play together."

How do I explain that logic to Mason's Mom?

*ADDENDUM FROM DAD*

When I came home tonight, I asked Smith if he had puked today. Smith said, "No pukes Dad. Just puke-poops."

Ice Cream Social 08

2008-05-05T09:59:00.005-06:00

Smith's best buddy Andrew Hoag.
The annual Peter Pan Preschool Ice Cream Social was last Saturday. The class did a short performance for the parents after the silent auction. Smitty was very proud of himself...and as if we didn't know all ready...loves to be on stage. He put on quite the show. So, without further ado...

Bouncey Balls?

2008-04-30T18:00:00.004-06:00

Mom: "Smith, please, keep your hands off your private."

Smith: "But Mom, what are these ball-ee things?"

Mom: "Well, balls, I guess."

Smith: "Can I take them out and bounce them in the tub?"

I never thought I would have to talk about this...ewe! Gross!

Diet Coke

2008-04-26T22:45:00.003-06:00

Smith: "Hey dad, can I have some of your drink?"
Dad: "No."
Smith: "What is it?"
Dad: "Coke."
Smith: "Is it Diet Coke?"
Dad: "Yes."
Smith: "You're not supposed to drink that."
Dad: "Says who?"
Smith: "Jesus."

Movie Night

2008-04-26T22:34:00.004-06:00

Dad: "Hey Smith, if you finish your mushroom soup, I'll go get you something . . . something that rhymes with groovy."
Smith: "A smoothie?"
Dad: "No."
Smith: "A booby?"
Dad and Mom: "What?" [laughter ensues.]
Smith: "Yeah, yeah, let's go get a booby!"
Dad and Mom: [laughter stops.] "WHAT???"
Smith: "I love booby traps!"
Dad: "Oh . . . right. Booby traps are cool. But I was thinking of getting you a movie. . . ."

Jellyheart

2008-04-23T20:55:00.004-06:00

Like many fathers and their children, Smith and I wrestle . . . all the time. Last night, as we wrestled, Smith was holding on to one of his beloved Hot Wheels cars. I rolled over him, and my body dug the car into his chest. He yelped in pain. Smith said the following:

"OUCH! Dad, you just broke off a piece of my heart! But that's okay . . . because tonight, my heart is a jellyfish, so the broken part of my heart grew back. I'm okay now. I'm ready to rock."

Speechless

2008-04-23T20:29:00.007-06:00

Two recent incidents have left us speechless.

A few days ago, Smith and his good buddy Ethan went over to play with the five-year-old boy that lives next door. When they came back, Ethan was wearing Smith's underwear and Smith wasn't wearing anything below the belt. As of yet, I have not heard a satisfactory explanation (it had something to do with sprinklers, and Ethan refusing to put his underwear back on because they were Venom underwear, not Spiderman).

Then, over the weekend, the boy next door came over to play at our house. I walked upstairs and heard both of them in the bathroom making quite a lot of noise. I opened the bathroom door and saw them both, naked. Neighbor-boy was sitting on the toilet doing business of a secondary nature, and laughing. Smith was standing in the tub peeing on all the tub toys, simulating the explosion and machine gun sounds that only small boys can make.

As I write this, I'm reminded of the scene in the movie "Better Off Dead" when Lane Meyer's father opens the bathroom door and sees Lane with Q-tips sticking out of his nostrils and ears, and making walrus/alien sounds at himself in the mirror. Lane's father looks at Lane for a moment, closes the door and slowly walks away.

I feel you Mr. Meyer. I feel you.

Don't cross the streams!

2008-04-21T18:48:00.003-06:00

As we were playing pass with a bouncy ball, I realized that Smitty desperately needed to use the bathroom. He was prancing instead of running. We quickly paused for a potty break.

"Mom, I'm going to use the guest bathroom. Come in with me. Let's do light sabers."
"Umm. Smith. I can't stand to go to the bathroom."
"Well, you have a private. Just use it. Come on! Dad and I do light sabers all the time."

Thanks Adam. Now I understand why I am constantly cleaning the toilets.

The "Itchers"

2008-04-08T22:20:00.004-06:00

It was warm for about five minutes today so I took the kids out for a quick walk to the park. Smith grabbed his beloved Yankees hat and was out the door and on his scooter in seconds flat. Not even a block away from home, he stopped dead in his tracks and yanked off his hat.
"Hey Mom. Do you know what itchers are?"
"No."
"Oh. Itchers are the bugs that live in hats that make your head itch."
He scratched his head really hard for a second, told me he got them all, slapped the hat back on his head and off he went to the park.
As long as the 'itchers' aren't really lice, then he can keep the hat.

Pop goes the Smitty

2008-04-07T13:52:00.004-06:00

Smith: "Dad, where did you pop out?"
Dad: "What?"
Smith: "When you were born, who did you pop out of?"
Dad: "Um . . . [clearing my throat], Oma."
Smith: "Where did mom pop out?"
Dad: "Poppy."
Smith: "I know where I popped out."
Dad: "Where?"
Smith: "Mommy's birth canal."

About a month ago, Smith asked me how a baby gets out of a mommy's tummy. I didn't want to tell him something untrue, but I wanted to keep it vague . . . so I told him that babies come out of the birth canal. Of course, he then wanted to know where a mommy's birth canal is. I tried to change the subject, but he wouldn't drop it, so I made something up. I told him that the birth canal attaches to the bellybutton when a baby is ready to be born. I'm an idiot, I know. We hadn't talked about it since.

Wondering where the dinosaurs went? Smith knows.

2008-04-05T15:55:00.005-06:00

This weekend, mom went to NYC with friends, so Smith, Laine and I took advantage. Last night, we rented a movie that is not mommy-approved: Jurassic Park III. While at Blockbuster, Smith assured me, "Dad, I can handle it," and then every time a dinosaur bit into a human, Smith told me, "Dad, I am handling it!" Despite Smith's handling of it, I fast-forwarded a few parts. After the movie ended, Smith explained to me where the dinosaurs had gone. His analysis is not quite at his cousin Chase's level, however, here it is nonetheless:

Dad, dinosaurs aren't stink-ed. There are real dinosaurs in Dinotopia, and the others turned into animals. You know giraffes dad? Giraffes used to be long-necks. When they were long-necks, they lived in Jurassic Park. Now, they live in giraffic parks.

This actually sounds more like something my mother-in-law would say to me

2008-04-02T15:53:00.005-06:00

Smith: "Dad, you are not bald; you have hair on the sides." Instructively, Smith demonstrates this phenomenon to me by gesticulating toward the appropriate areas on my head. "And, I think I even see some hairs on the top."

"Frustration" personified

2008-03-31T18:06:00.005-06:00

The Setting: Mom, Laine and Smith are hurrying to the gate to fly home to Colorado after spring break (do pre-schoolers really need spring break? They need a break from play time?). They are just on time according to Whitley's schedule, which means they have about two minutes to get to the gate.

Mom: "Smith, what are you doing? We need to get to the gate!"

Smith: "Hey mom, guess what I am."

Mom: "What? What are you doing?"

Smith: "I'm pretending to be a rock!" (Smith bends down and grips his knees to his chest, and keeps completely still for the first time in recorded history. From his office in Colorado, Adam hears the faint sound of a familiar scream coming from the west.)

Just Disneyland

2008-03-31T12:11:00.005-06:00

Our trip to Disneyland last week with Poppy and Uncle Gray, was a surprise for Smith. This was precautionary because of the level of hyper-ness that would have consumed him the week prior to getting to Disneyland. We didn't even let on until we were on the tram that took us from the parking lot to the entrance to the park. Smith thought all along we were headed to the zoo, until the driver of the tram came on the loud speaker and said, "Welcome to Disneyland Park."

Totally shocked and a tad let down, Smith said, "This isn't the real Disneyland. This is only Disneyland Park."

It wasn't until the very end of the night, 12 hours later, as we took a picture by the Mickey Mouse at the entrance, that Smith said, "That really was Disneyland, wasn't it?"

Our little Tom Sawyer

2008-03-31T12:02:00.003-06:00

Mom: "Hey Smith, can you go pick up the Lincoln Logs and put them back in their tin, please?"

Smith (in the other room): "Hey Poppy. Could you carefully put these in there?"

Not so nice.

2008-03-31T11:56:00.003-06:00

Poppy: "Smith, are you excited to see Poppy and Geeps?"

Smith: "I'm excited to see Graydon."

California Dreamin'

2008-03-30T00:13:00.004-06:00

Mom: "You need to get ready for the beach Smitty."

Smith: "Wait. You mean Aunt Shanon lives by Disneyland and the beach?! Whoa. That is awesome. . . ."

Easter Egg Hunt

2008-03-21T15:13:00.003-06:00

Smith's best buddy Ethan Stout

Smitty's Snowman

2008-03-21T13:11:00.006-06:00

March in Colorado...still a bit chilly!

Heart to Heart Talks between Smith and Mom

2008-03-16T20:31:00.004-06:00

#1
Smith: "Mom, I pray to the superheroes everyday. At breakfast, lunch, dinner and at bed."
Mom: "What about Heavenly Father, do you pray to him?"
Smith: "No . . . only superheros."

#2
When Smith told Mom that his girlfriend was going to marry another four-year-old, Mom told him that Ellie wouldn't marry anyone unless the boy got her dad's permission. Smith's reply: "If he says okay, then Ellie will marry me? Let's call him right now. What's his number?"

#3
"Mom, do you know that so many girls like me? Like all of them. Girls just stop and stare and smile at me. They do it all the time. They think I'm cute or something."

#4
Smith: "Mom, tell me a superhero story."
Mom: "Smith, I don't have one in my head right now.
Smith: "Then I'll put my brain in your head, and my brain will tell your brain a superhero story, and then you can tell it to me . . . okay?"

#5
[While practicing saying his scripture for primary sharing time]
"'. . . For my soul delighteth in the scriptures, and my heart pondereth them. . . .' But Mom, my heart isn't shaped like a brain. . . ."

Guilty until proven innocent

2008-03-12T10:42:00.005-06:00

After school yesterday, I was informed by a third party that Smitty was not on his best behavior at school...something about listening or something. So, I sat Smith down to ask him what happened at school.

Mom: "Smith, how was school?"
Smith: "Good. Fun."
Mom: "Oh."
Smith: "Mom. It's just that I cheated when we were playing tag outside. So, that's all."

This was all that he could come up with. I of course believed the parent and not Smith and assumed that he had done something horrible at school. He was sent to his room without a play-date for the day.

Well, today when I showed up at school, one of the other parents profusely apologized to me for her son's behavior. She was mortified that her son had hurt Smith at school yesterday. SMITH WAS INNOCENT! He was completely innocent and I feel so bad that I didn't believe him! Guess I have some major kissing up to do....

Dinner Quips Encore

2008-02-26T21:57:00.001-07:00

"If I swallowed my eyeball, I could look down at the food in my stomach."

Dinner Quips

2008-02-22T16:59:00.001-07:00

"That smells so good my eyes are watering."

"I don't want to say the prayer . . . EE-I EE-I OH."

"The good food goes in my mouth and then it goes over here in my body to give me energy. The bad food goes down here and into here, and then over here where there are axes and swords and stuff that chop it up and then it turns into poop."

Rock-Paper-Scissors

2008-02-18T14:17:00.006-07:00

Yesterday, Smith and I were sitting on the couch relaxing, when we decided to play Rock-Paper-Scissors. Like everything in Smith's life, it soon became competitive. After the second game, Smith was already cheating. I scolded him, but he was relentless. He was doing anything and everything he could to catch a break.

He tried "The Delay" (When one player delays committing to a hand formation until the last second in an attempt to glimpse the opponent's hand maneuvering). He tried "The Countdown Malfunction" (When one player throws down on four instead of three after the opponent has already shown his formation). And in a last-ditch, pitiful attempt, he tried "The Switcheroo" (After both players have thrown down, one player changes formations to whatever defeats the opponent and explains, "I forgot I wanted to be rock"). That was the last straw.

"Smith, I'm not going to keep playing if you're going to cheat." I warned paternally. Smith dropped his hands defiantly, pursed his lips, and gave me a menacing stare. After a moment, he silently extended his left hand, palm facing up, with his right hand in a fist. I interpreted this gesture to mean: This one is for the game. "Okay, one more." I said. "You're not going to cheat?" Smith shook his head. I accepted. Then just before we started the countdown, I saw the corner of his mouth turn up.

"One, two, three!" we said in unison. I threw down paper. I looked at Smith's hand. His index finger was pointed directly at me and his thumb stood up vertically. "Gun beats paper. I win. BANG!"

Finally, he wants to be like Jesus . . . sort of.

2008-02-06T09:39:00.000-07:00

Followers of Smittyisms know that Smith hasn't always been best buddies with Jesus. Last night, I was reading an article in Newsweek about President Hinckley. Adjacent to the article, was something about Christian artifacts with a large picture of a golden crucifix. Smitty stood up on his chair and began to show me how Jesus died on the cross. He must have just learned about it in primary, because he went into a five minute ordeal about how they put him up there with nails and on and on and on. I stopped him, thinking I could turn this into a "teaching moment." I posed a few questions and told him why Jesus died and that after he died he was resurrected and what that meant.

Smith: Whoa, wait. Stop. Is that what they did to President Hinckley too?

Mom: Umm, No.

Smith: Well. I want to be like Jesus. That would be so cool . . . then I can die and then come back to life. Mom don't you want to die so that you can come back to life? That is like the best magic trick!